The Bully Business,” in The Atlantic, by Cevin Solving is absolutely wrong.

Solving uses inappropriate analogies, like stopping head injury to boxers is the same as stopping bullies in schools.  And his underlying assumption about how to stop bullying in schools, shared by many people, is that we should find out why kids bully, give bullies what they want and then they’ll stop bullying.  His culprit is that schools control bullies too much; bullies don’t have enough freedom so they turn to abusing their peers.  He focuses on the wrong people; the bullies instead of focusing on the targets of harassment and violence.

The beginning of the solution is to protect targets and stop bullies.
Solving doesn’t consider this first step.  He assumes bullies are nice people and if they weren’t thwarted they wouldn’t turn to bullying to get what they want.  Evidently he doesn’t like the analogy with the kids in “Lord of the Flies” and all the rest of human history which shows that not all people are born nice, kindly and virtuous, and that civility must be taught and reinforced.

Principals, counselors, teachers and staff have a primary responsibility of protecting targets by stopping bullies and removing them.  Then education and socialization can begin.

Bullies must learn that their tactics don’t get them what they want.
My experience has been that an essential step in bullies’ education is when they learn that they get into more trouble if they continue bullying.  Then many become interested in learning other ways of acting.

The ones who resist this learning, the ones who continue bullying and who get more violent are not the kids to whom we want to give more freedom and latitude.  They are the ones who need to be removed faster.

First, protect the targets, the try to rehabilitate the perpetrators.

The best way to learn how to parent bully-proof kids and to develop a program to stop school bullying is to hire Dr. Ben for personalized coaching and counseling so you can:
1. Develop the strength, courage, will and determination to be and to act your best resolutely, diligently and effectively.
2. Develop a plan and master the skills necessary to create the life your spirit has always hungered for.

Since all tactics depend on the situation, call me at 1-877-8Bullies for expert coaching by phone or Skype.