You want the people on your team to get along with one another and to work well together. But beware of self-appointed middle-men or peace makers. They actually promote whining and complaining, and lead your team to wallow in emotional turmoil and dissention.

For example, Carl felt it was his job as a “people person” to smooth over ruffled feelings and make his teammates happy. He said, “When we get along better, we produce more. Happy employees are productive employees.”

To read the rest of this article from the Pacific Business News (Honolulu), see: Well-Meaning ‘peacemakers’ can disrupt your workplace http://www.bizjournals.com/pacific/stories/2010/04/26/story11.html

The Carl’s of this world:

Pour gasoline on the emotional fires and leave a trail of misunderstanding and anger. But they insist they’re just trying to help.
May be well-intentioned, but when they act as go-betweens, gossip, innuendo and hostile emotions invariably escalate. Work suffers.
Are abusive, sneaky, manipulative bullies.
Usually they love the emotional turmoil and uproar. They feel alive when emotions are on the line and necessary when they’re intervening. They can’t resist being middlemen.

Meddling managers, setting the tone for their teams, cause the most damage. Of course, women meddle just as much as men.

Distinguish the Carl’s of this world from the bridge people who are crucial to the success of any organization.

There was a way Carl’s manager could eliminate the high cost of his bullying and low attitudes.

All tactics are situational. Expert coaching and consulting can help you create and implement a plan that fits you and your organization.

Harry defended himself by saying that he was following rules he’d heard in training: to increase teamwork, bring people together often; review production in your group often so you can keep people on track; give immediate feedback in public so everyone can learn from one person’s mistakes. But Harry is a micromanager. Instead of making things better, he made them worse. He created frustration and dissention and stifled his staff’s initiative.

To read the rest of this article from the Philadelphia Business Journal, see: Micromanagers just don’t know when to let up http://www.bizjournals.com/philadelphia/print-edition/2010/10/29/micromanagers-just-dont-know-when-to.html

Micromanagers rarely have enough time for the important tasks. They’re too busy managing the minutiae. Of course, good managers make sure important tasks are done right. But micromanagers think everything is a priority. They can’t distinguish between what’s crucial for them to be doing with their own hands and what’s a waste of their time. They’re usually nit-picking perfectionists with all-or-none thinking.

Micromanaging is usually driven by narcissism and fear. Harry thought he was the only one who knew how to do things right. He was afraid that if he let others forge ahead, they’d fail and his career would be derailed. Also, he was afraid that if he gave his staff freedom, someone might outshine him.

Breaking the micromanaging habit is difficult. Typically, as in Harry’s case, understanding when and why he developed the habit didn’t change his behavior.

But there was a way Harry’s manager could eliminate the high cost of Harry’s addiction to low attitudes. She could help him change his behavior.

All tactics are situational. Expert coaching and consulting can help you create and implement a plan that fits you and your organization.

Harry defended himself by saying that he was following rules he’d heard in training: to increase

teamwork, bring people together often; review production in your group often so you can keep people on

track; give immediate feedback in public so everyone can learn from one person’s mistakes.

Post #156 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Stop Bullies: Ignore Their Excuses, Justifications http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2011/02/28/stop-bullies-ignore-their-excuses-justifications/

Post #194 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Stop workplace bullies who beat you up with the rules http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2011/10/12/stop-workplace-bullies-who-beat-you-up-with-the-rules/

But Harry is a micromanager. Instead of making things better, he made them worse. He created frustration

and dissention and stifled his staff’s initiative.

Post #190 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Be wary of these business animals http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2011/09/27/be-wary-of-these-business-animals/

Micromanagers rarely have enough time for the important tasks. They’re too busy managing the minutiae.

Of course, good managers make sure important tasks are done right. But micromanagers think everything is

a priority. They can’t distinguish between what’s crucial for them to be doing with their own hands and

what’s a waste of their time. They’re usually nit-picking perfectionists with all-or-none thinking.

Post #14 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Top ten ways to create a hostile workplace http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2008/02/26/top-ten-ways-to-create-a-hostile-workplace/

Post #114 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Self-Bullying Perfectionism Can Ruin Your Life http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2010/04/12/self-bullying-perfectionism-can-ruin-your-life/

Micromanaging is usually driven by narcissism and fear. Harry thought he was the only one who knew how

to do things right. He was afraid that if he let others forge ahead, they’d fail and his career would be

derailed. Also, he was afraid that if he gave his staff freedom, someone might outshine him.

Post #52 – BulliesBeGoneBlog 7 Signs of narcissistic control-freaks http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2009/02/05/7-signs-of-narcissistic-control-freaks/

Post #19 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Stop verbal abuse by a know-it-all-boss http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2008/03/19/stop-verbal-abuse-by-a-know-it-all-boss/

Post #117 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Stop Bullies at Work: Control Freaks http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2010/05/04/stop-bullies-at-work-control-freaks/

Breaking the micromanaging habit is difficult. Typically, as in Harry’s case, understanding when and why

he developed the habit didn’t change his behavior.

Post #198 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Micromanagement is a double-edged sword http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2011/10/26/micromanagement-is-a-double-edged-sword/

Post #88 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Stop Bullies: Will Knowing Why Bullies Keep Abusing Us Help Us Stop Them? http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2009/10/04/stop-bullies-will-knowing-why-bullies-keep-abusing-us-help-us

-stop-them/

But there was a way Harry’s manager could eliminate the high cost of Harry’s addiction to low attitudes.

She could help him change his behavior.

BulliesBeGone Books and CDs http://www.bulliesbegone.com/products.html

All tactics are situational. Expert coaching and consulting can help you create and implement a plan

that fits you and your organization.

Post #63 – BulliesBeGoneBlog Workplace Bullying and Harassment: Recognize Common Techniques Bullies Use http://www.bulliesbegoneblog.com/2009/03/25/workplace-bullying-and-harassment-recognize-common-techniques

-bullies-use/

BulliesBeGone Hire Ben http://www.bulliesbegone.com/hire_ben.html

Well-Meaning, Meddling 'Peacemakers' can Disrupt Your Workplace

Micromanagers just don't know when to let up