Jane’s husband always knew what was best for her and got angry when she wouldn’t follow his suggestions.  Jack’s friend knew what Jack should do to further his career and was sarcastic when Jack don’t follow his directives.  Even though she was 35 and independent, April’s parents still told her what she should do to be happy and when she didn’t follow their orders, they told the whole family what a disobedient and ungrateful child she was.

I have a personal aversion to these righteous people who harass, bully and abuse us.  They think they’re important.  They want their values and rules to rule.

They’re missionaries.  They know they’re right, they know what’s best, they have the only truth and our desires, values and opinions don’t matter.  Their logic, reasoning and opinions are their gods.

They’re adept at manipulation through criticism, guilt and recriminations: “I told you a year ago but you didn’t listen to me and look where you are now.”

They use disapproval, confrontations and your politeness to enslave you.  Get over having to be polite.  Be willing to do what you want.  If they get upset that’s their choice.  Get over the fear of confrontations.

Be willing to make your own mistakes based on your best judgment.  That’s how you’ll learn to improve your judgment in the service of your values and desires.

Don’t let these people near you.  Don’t allow them to give their opinions.  Don’t get advice from people who want to beat you into submission.  Don’t become a slave to people who want to control you because they know what’s best for you.  Get what you need from someone who simply discusses things and even gives advice with no strings attached.

You have a wide range of actions to choose from, depending on the situation.

Be prepared: Righteous, abusive, missionaries won’t change and they will strike back.  They can’t let you get away with thinking on your own and disobeying them.

The best way to stop bullying, manipulative, righteous missionaries is to hire Dr. Ben for personalized coaching and counseling so you can:

  1. Develop the strength, courage, will and determination to be and to act your best resolutely, diligently and effectively.
  2. Develop a plan and master the skills necessary to create the bully-free life your spirit has always hungered for.

Since all tactics depend on the situation, call me at 1-877-8Bullies for expert coaching by phone or Skype.

AuthorBen Leichtling